While I breathe I Hope

Hope is such a tenuous entity. Some days I wonder if it's fear or hope that holds me back. Will I ever be able to make a decision while hope guides my judgment?

Ok, enough with the ambiguous questions - let me explain.

We all make choices every day. Check. You know that.
Some choices have more impact then others. Again, you know this.
But what if the hope for something better prevents us from seizing the opportunities we are presented with; like a an unholy union between hoping for something better, and fear of settling for the less than the ideal...

I have always been an incurable romantic. I had read all the Austen and Bronte novels by the age of 12. By 14 I had stopped speaking to anyone outside of my family. In my mind, the world had revealed itself, and it was not the Gothic fairy-tale I had always wished for. I wanted something better, something tidy - heartbreak and sorrow were only meant to exist within the assured boundaries of a happy ending.
 
I outgrew my miserable idealistic phase...to a point. But something inside of me still clings to the hope that there is perfection out there.

But then again, didn't our mothers tell us that nothing and no one is perfect? Goodness knows I'm anything but perfect.

But even if that hope of 'better' will forever linger in my mind and hold me back from certain opportunities and prospects, I Say Thanks Anyway for the protection is has given me in certain instances. Not all opportunities are good - and my overly romantic notions have certainly saved me from those.

Having said that, I have also learned to ignore that little bead of hope&fear and to take some risks. And the risks were so worth it!

So I guess the lesson I need to learn is: Don't settle for just anything, but don't let the hope of something better hold you back.